So that sticks me with the weird things... now weird, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. So I'm going to classify unusual as weird... surely I can come up with seven. It's a very holy number, after all. How's this?
Seven Weird Jobs I Have Had:
- Beginning at the beginning: my first job at age 15 was elf. That's correct. I worked in Santa's toyshop (store that sold toys) as an elf at Santa's Village in Jefferson, NH. I wore red tights, a little green dress with a mini-skirt and a huge pointy collar and pointy-toed bootlets that we ordered special from the shoe store. I worked there five summers before moving on to my next weird job.
- I am a Vietnam vet. I was a U. S. Navy photographer. I lived in fear of ever having to go out and actually shoot anything important. (Not shoot as with a gun... shoot as photograph.) I used a speed graphic (heavy as hell) with real flash bulbs. Most of my Navy career was spent in the color lab at NAS Jax processing slides and print film... anyone ever heard of E3? My last experience with slide processing was E6. For all I know they are up to E12 by now.
- I worked as a sandwich maker for one day in the Navy Exchange. You had to lay the bread slices out ten across and five deep. They stacked up like this: one slice, tuna, two slices, tuna, one slice. They were cut on the diagonal and boxed so you didn't actually get the whole sandwich; you got two halves of two different sandwiches. I was too slow and got fired the same day.
- I worked for an audio visual production company producing multi-image slide presentations. (Twenty-one projectors was my personal best.) Long hours. Lots of all-nighters. Low pay. Fun road trips.
- I was a nationally certified motorcycle instructor. I taught young punks how to avoid killing themselves on their motorcycles. I was very good at that job.
- I danced in a go-go bar (once). I was not employed there, I was with a date. The pole dancer beckoned me to join her onstage and I was drunk enough to do it. I earned a dollar. (Decided to keep my day job.)
- I'm a nun. Not sure I can call this a job since I don't earn an income. But I definitely work.