what honor?

I have a new hobby. Well, it's not exactly new, I've just taken it to a new level. Movie watching. Specifically all the movies I've wanted to see over the years, (many Academy Award nominees) but for one reason or another... just never saw. My son gave me one of those cute little portable DVD players a couple of Christmases ago and it's been one of my favorite toys.

It began with all the DVDs we actually have on the shelf here in the convent, which isn't many. Then I had a gift certificate to Blockbuster which was good for a few more, then I discovered paydirt... the library. Yes, I actually even borrow books from the library, but truth be told, I'm mostly after the DVDs. I started with whatever happened to be on the shelf that looked remotely interesting. In the past year I have seen more foreign films with subtitles than I ever saw in the year I actually took a class in foreign films. My favorite was an Indian film The Namesake, produced and directed by Mira Nair.

But when I found out recently that the library has an online search engine and you can type in things like Heath Ledger... a whole new level of opportunity opened up to me. I watched the entire series of ROAR, and have a few more of his movies on hold for when they become available.

I finally got to see Prizzi's Honor. I can't tell you how many people have told me what a great flick that was. Okay. I don't get it. It was billed as a comedy, yet it wasn't especially funny. And what honor is there in two people supposedly crazy about each other who don't mind killing each other? Maybe you had to be there.

And the winners are:

I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that I had been awarded one of those by bloggers/for bloggers awards: the Thinking Blogger Award, to be exact. You can stop laughing. ("I think, therefore I am") At the time, there was way too much other stuff going on for me to give my own bestowal of this award much critical thought... but I promised I would do a subsequent post.

I have thought about it. I read (and bookmark) lots of blogs and websites, but I've found that I only read one or two consistently every day. That has more to do with my available time than with any blog's merit. Most of the ones I read I play catch up with every few days. That seems to work. My five blogs of choice, to pay this homage forward, are listed below. I actually tried to list a few you may not be familiar with, rather than keep going round and round in a mutual admiration society. If you're not listed and you know I read your blog, don't think it's because I didn't deem you worthy. (I wouldn't be reading your stupid blog if I didn't deem you worthy!) However, If you are listed, you are eligible to do the following:

1. Write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think.

2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme.

3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote (here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn't match your blog's color scheme.)

So here they are: my top five thinking blogs... or in some cases, websites, (not necessarily in any kind of order):

• Wandering Wonderings
Currently on the offensive in her third (I think) battle with cancer, Pat Denino, woman of wonder, ponders a myriad of questions about life, love, creativity and whatever else strikes her fancy... Here's how she introduces her blog: There are a lot of questions floating around the universe, waiting for someone to ask them. One of those people would be me... Please join me in dancing the questions. Oh, she is definitely big on dancing... and I'll be one of her dance partners any day.

• grace-full thoughts
Sr. Catherine Grace writes about the sacredness of creation, life in community, work on an organic farm, and how these all interrelate with her monastic vows. She's willing to tackle questions and issues with guts and gifted eloquence... and I'm not saying that just because she's my sister...

• A Peculiar Prophet
Now who would have though a Methodist Bishop from Birmingham, Alabama would be on my list? Just goes to show you that people who make you think come in all sizes, shapes and disguises. And a Southern Baptist friend was the one who gave me the link.

• This one is not exactly a blog per say. It's more of an art exhibit called Post Secret... but it has a blogspot address and certainly makes me think. Every Sunday a new batch of postcards are downloaded. These are anonymous, hand-made postcards, each describing a secret the sender needs to get off their chest. Amazing work.

• And last, but in a category all its own, Jesus and Mo is a cartoon strip that borders on the blasphemous, (those of you who are offended by religious slurs should probably not go there) yet in their own way these cartoons make me think outside the box and challenge my own narrow views about God and His/Her prophets. Here's a sample from a couple of days ago that seems a good way to end this post.

not all prayer and sweet acts of charity

In any organization, there is a corporate culture that makes up the invisible nuts and bolts of how the entity runs. A monastic community is no different from a business when it comes to that. The difference is the culture itself. My own community tries to take into account the diverse viewpoints of each of its members, so issues you might never think about discussing (in your life) must be analyzed, measured, hashed over, hammered in, and agreed upon here. It makes for lengthy meetings and some tough decision making. All opinions are counted and weighed.

For example, I can't just decide to paint my room without checking it out with the house, can't make plans to go out to dinner with out-of-town friends without asking permission. Those requests are managed on a day-to-day basis, but larger issues must be handled in our monthly meetings.

The agendas for these meetings are diverse and reflect community-wide concerns: the liturgy, dress code, family dynamics, candidate formation, budget reports. Some of the topics never go away, but some are new. Last month's topic was new: blogging... and its impact on community. Because blogging is a relatively new activity for monastics (as is email and websites and the whole cyberspace experience) it only stands to reason that it would surface as a topic at some point. And, as I am a dedicated blogger, it certainly got my attention.

To say the discussion was difficult (for me) is an understatement. I dislike meetings in general, and any discussion that gets personal is hard to participate in, without going straight to emotional response. There were comments from sisters who have never read my blog, yet have clear opinions about it; there was concern that my content and my sometimes colorful language are inappropriate for a nun, hurt feelings from posts describing life and personalities I struggle with, that never surfaced until the meeting. There was an overall question: does blogging, in and of itself, remove a sister from her environment and allow her to live in a virtual fantasy world? Some of our sisters are already addicted to online solitaire and video games, might not blogging be another way to escape?

It was not all negative. But since I am human (as I keep reminding my readers) I focused on the negative. The upshot of the discussion was that nobody was shut down, but that all of us who blog (three in our community) will continue to be self-censoring, keeping in mind the concerns that surfaced. There were a few explicit guidelines covering language and content... so... no more *'s for me.

I was unable to write for several days. What was there to say? I didn't want to give it up, but if my blog was such a bone of contention, what was the point? Then St. Patrick's Day arrived and I finally posted again. It was a miracle. I was cured.

To say that blogging has become a spiritual exercise for me is an understatement. But it is also a creative endeavor, one that fills a void I never knew was there, until I started doing it. So it was with mild amusement that I learned I had been awarded the Thinking Blogger Award, not by one, but by two people who read my posts. Thanks guys. It makes being in the hot seat at that meeting worth it.

As a recipient of this award I get to choose five blogs that I read on a regular basis and give them the award. I will do that. (After Easter. Next week some time. In the near future.) Stay tuned. Oh, and by the way, my mother thanks you... my children thank you... my sisters may not thank you...