I think the concept of forgiveness gets a bum rap because it's another one of those ironic God Truths. Folks assume that the forgiver is the one sacrificing his grudge on the altar of God, when in fact the act of forgiving is like a very strong antibiotic to help the forgiver heal.
The ones being forgiven often don't even know about it, so it's not always FOR them. They don't know or they don't care or they are dead. Even if someone asks you to forgive them, they aren't always ready for you to do it. Guilt, embarrassment, needing to find a glimmer of justification for whatever it was they did, will prevent the graceful acceptance of your forgiveness. It's for YOU. You get the prize, not the sacrifice.
Just one minor detail… letting go. You have to let go of being offended. Being wronged. Being hurt. Always a catch…
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2 comments:
Okay, what did you do? ;)
Just kidding. I had to apologize recently, and the other person said "apology accepted." I suppose that's a variation of "forgive me" and "I forgive you." Being that it was a big boo-boo, I had to lay it on heavy with a follow up of a note card and then flowers.
Hi Sister!
You're absolutely right to bring out the aspects of not-forgiving that pain us; holding on to that instead of letting go and letting love flow out of us is not only bad for the forgivee, but for the forgiver.
I do think there is something going on, some kind of invisible strands of grudge, that keep someone who wrongs us tied to us, though. I think we underestimate how much forgiving someone in our heart, even if we're no longer in contact with them, can do.
(Found you via Mark Mossa, BTW!)
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