Tuesday, April 19, 2011


Explain the glory, God.

Every year it's like this. I get closer to Good Friday and my doubt overwhelms my faith.

I am not big on pain... mine or anyone else's. I am especially not big on unnecessary pain, and this whole Jesus died for my sins thing puts the blame on me. Me... and you... and every other sorry member of the human species. Yes, I understand how amazingly mind-blowing it is to worship a God who stooped to endure human form... to live and die as a human being. But some human beings die peacefully in their sleep. (At least that's what we tell ourselves.) Or they die quickly. Most of us do not linger for hours in agony, with other people watching our every sigh and groan, waiting for us to die so they can be "right".

I really do hate this week.

1 comment:

Chris said...

Thank you for your gut-wrenching honesty. To hear your doubt and struggle is to feel your companionship in my own doubt and struggle. And is there, after all, a more sacred gift?

I want to thank you also for these beautiful and evocative images, these unfolding scrolls of Holy Week.